Raising a Farmer

Alot of work but always room for laughter

Happy Mother’s Day

on May 10, 2015

This starts out kind of sad but I promise it will end happy.  I lost my mom to breast cancer in 2001.  I was 20.  I lost her before I was really interested in dating anyone special.  I was enjoying time with my friends.  The thought of having my own children were the very last thing on my mind.  Let alone marriage, I had lots of time to talk and ask my mom about that later.  I lost her before I had a chance to call her from my own house, I was still living at home when she passed.  Going on outings with my children and my mom is not a reality of mine.  I lost her before my first date with Nate.  I lost her before Nate asked me to be his wife and I said, “Yes” and then “I Do”.  My brothers and I never saw her face when she would have been told she would be a grandma for the very first time.  She was not there to call or to come visit when adjusting to marriage life and motherhood were not what I thought I had signed up for.  She was not there when the thought of Everett starting school terrified me to death.  My mom was not the first person I called when the doctors told me they were going to have to take my new baby girl to the NICU.  When early stages of pregnancy would wreck my body my husband would ask me what he could do and all I did was burst into tears, “I want my mom…..”  She was not there to console me when I thought a second miscarriage was to much to bear. There are so many things that she was not there for and that she will continue not to be there for as our lives continue without her.  I think of Mother’s Day differently now, not because I have no mom or that I am a mom myself but all the strong women I surround myself with that help me be the best mom that I can be.  I think of all and each one that helps me be that mom.  I have aunts who love my children unconditionally, console me when I think life is just to hard, go shopping with, sew with, but more importantly laugh with.  I have my best friend that knew my mom and I can laugh with her and cry with her, she has always kept me grounded.  There is my very dear friend who also lost her mom and we can talk how hard it is sometimes not having our own mom and how it will just sneak up on you how much you miss her.  I have friends that never knew me before I was married and I just met after being a mom who I navigate motherhood with.  There are my mom’s friends who gush over my children.  My cousins are my constant rock, some have children and some do not.  There is the complete stranger at the grocery store who told my son he has a good mom because I said no to him when he asked to get a Mountain Dew at the checkout counter.  I have my dairy moms close and far that encourage me when being a dairy mom is just plain hard.  My mother-in-law, sister-in-laws, mentor moms and the one my son calls auntie  I have Everett’s kindergarten teacher who made his first year of school a great year.   There are such strong wonderful beautiful women in my life that help me each step and stage of my life.  I take bits and pieces of each and every person.  All of those pieces put together make up a mom for me today.

Happy Mother’s Day!

Mother's Day 2015

Mother’s Day 2015

7 responses to “Happy Mother’s Day

  1. Jodi says:

    Wow Brenda, what a beautiful Mother’s Day story! You are right, you surround yourself with wonderful people to support you! I can imagine how proud your mom is of you! I’m so glad we met because I can’t imagine my life without your fiamily in it! Love you and Happy Mothers Day!!

  2. Cathy says:

    Happy Mother’s Day!!

  3. Thanks Jodi!! We are so happy that you are a part of our lives!! You have helped me in so many ways!! Love you lots!!

  4. Beka says:

    so beautiful Brenda! Thank you for sharing, so many good reminders of how many wonderful mothers have influence on me and my children!!! blessings on your day!

  5. Cindy Nylen says:

    This is a beautiful tribute to your mom. She was loving, great listener, fun to be with and share my time and our children being raised together, I remember our summers going to the zoo with kids and just turning up the music and singing fun songs, She loved everyones kids. I miss her too….

  6. Theresa Hollermann says:

    Brenda, What a great tribute to your Mom. I feel so lucky that she was such a good friend to me. I miss her so much. From being in each other’s wedding to watching a Bonanza marathon with Donnie she was so awesome. I know that your parents and Don are in heaven together and sending down their graces and guidance to both of us. Happy Mother’s Day
    Love, your godmother Theresa

  7. holly vogt says:

    Brenda, you inspire me. I wish i had the courage to be so open and honest with the world! Keep it up, your words are beautiful!

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